Cautiousness

I had a breakup in 2011 and my coping mechanism was chatting and spending a lot of time with a subset of friends.

Unfortunately, my passive clinginess got to the point where I was constantly worried those friends didn’t consider me a close friend the same way I considered them close friends.

Incidentally, that was around the time I met someone who would go on to be an actual best friend of mine.

It’s hard for me to call someone a best friend these days. I don’t want to be under the impression that I have a close friendship, only to find out it wasn’t, so I keep my distance a bit; I don’t want to come off as a particularly clingy person and I’m worried if I’m clingy once, I’m going to do it again and again.

But when I find out someone I genuinely enjoy spending time with considers me a best friend, and thus I can call them the same, it feels really nice. <3

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